Night out (2009 Challenge)
Did you have a night out with friends or a loved one that rocked your world? Who was there? What was the highlight of the night?
October was rife with nights out with friends.
Nini & John treated us to dinner at Marrakech* in celebration of their employment with Century 21. The highlight of that evening was, most definitely, watching Nini get up and belly dance after having recently had both hips replaced!
Later that month, I took a weekend trip to San Jose and had a great time with my friends Debbi and Maria. Nothing beats some concentrated girlfriend time. We laughed til we peed ourselves! (Sorry - no pictures of that.)
A couple of days after returning, Steve and I tried a new (to us) Italian restaurant in Davis (it was great) and attended An Acoustic Evening with Lyle Lovett and John Hiatt at the Mondavi Center.
The following weekend, Koby and Brooke and I made the drive to Fullerton to visit with Spike. And the weekend after that, Steve and I drove down again!
I guess we weren't home much at all in October. Each of those events held its own high points, of course. I loved seeing Koby and Brooke have the opportunity to spend time with Spike. I was so happy to see Trevor and Bettie and the rest of that crowd, and glad that Steve got to meet everyone he's been hearing so much about.
* In jumping out to find the link for Marrakech, it appears they've disappeared. I am stunned and trying to find out more info about this. I discovered Zaheea, my all-time fav bd, has retired, but will wait for her reply to my email before I can relate the whole scoop. Wow.
Book (2009 Blog Challenge)
Even though I've owned this book for years, and read it countless times, to myself as well as to anyone who will hold still long enough, it continues to be the one book I purchase again and again.
In November my first grandchild turned one year old. Click here to read the rest of the story: And Now We Are One
Article (2009 Blog Challenge)
What's an article that you read that blew you away? That you shared with all your friends. That you Delicious'd and reference throughout the year.
Well, I don't "Delicious" anything, and since when did that become a verb? Don't EVEN get me started on verbing.
I wouldn't use the phrase "blew me away," but THIS did definitely stick to my brain and I chose to share it with my little corner of the universe. I can only hope that all my soap-boxing :) doesn't go unnoticed and that someone - anyone - one of both of my Followers - picks up the torch and runs with it.
It's an uphill battle, but it can still be fun!
Restaurant moment (2009 Blog Challenge)
Share the best restaurant experience you had this year. Who was there? What made it amazing? What taste stands out in your mind?
It was only a week ago, so it's very fresh in my mind, but that's not why I've chosen this particular restaurant visit as my "Best of 2009."
I didn't choose it because the restaurant was spectacular. Sudwerk: okay, not horrible, but nothing to write Zagat about.
I didn't choose it because of the view, which actually wasn't too shabby: sun going down over the American River, free-agent cats wandering the balcony looking for scraps of food.
I didn't choose it for the exquisite fare. My meal consisted of turkey cooked just a wee bit too long, ham with a sticky cherry sauce, overly-salty stuffing and overly-candied yams. (The green beans with onions and mushrooms, however, were delish.)
I chose this particular restaurant experience as my Best of 2009 because it was a gift to heal my heart.
Surprising even myself, Thanksgiving hit me between the eyes this year. It's been five years since the divorce, and I could have sworn I was So Over All That, but for some reason -- could it have been the recently emptied nest? perhaps the glaring lack of family around my large dining table? or maybe I just need my thyroid checked again? -- Thursday morning found me sobbing in the shower. I was sad, lonely, and oh-so-angry that my family had been scattered hither and yon without anyone so much as asking my opinion.
I wept in the shower because it is my quiet space, my meditation room. And because there was a part of me that felt really selfish and childish so I wanted to keep it to myself. But Steve found me there, puffy-eyed and snotty-nosed. He stripped down, climbed in, and held me tight, urging me to cry it all out.
I had moved the pork tenderloin from the freezer to the fridge on Tuesday. I intended to stuff it with grilled red and yellow peppers, onions, asparagus and Parmesan, and roast it for our Thanksgiving dinner. We would eat it on plates balanced on our knees as we watched some movie or another. But this was the first year I wasn't making a Family Feast and I felt miserable. All I wanted to do was get out of the house so we went for an aimless drive.
The kids will come for dinner another time. Maybe sometime in January we'll have a Festivus for the rest of us. All of our children had fun with their respective doings, everyone got home well-fed and safe, and the evening ended very differently than it began, with Steve, Kashi and I watching the flames lick at the fire logs, the only source of light in a peaceful, darkened house.
Okay, I'll bite.
I heard it through the grapevine.Blogging every day in December, huh? It's a challenge for me, time-wise, but if you can do it, I'll do my best!What was your best trip in 2009?
Debbi and I met when we were three years old. It was the early 60's and the houses were just being built. My family's was completed first, and we had moved in a couple of years prior. The Una'Dia family was just finishing construction of theirs. It was five houses down from mine and for some reason my mother felt it was safe to let a three year old wander the neighborhood and play. Ah, the good old days!
As the family arrived to check the progress of their home, they found little ol' me playing in a huge pile of sand that had been dumped in their front yard. Debbi began playing with me, and we've been thick as thieves ever since.
Well, not entirely steadily. As time passed, life sometimes elbowed in between us. High school cliques, marriages and kids, although welcome distractions, were distractions nonetheless. We would still exchange birthday and Christmas cards, and maybe get a call or two in during the year, but for far too long we saw little of each other. Debbi developed some health challenges, and I felt bad I couldn't be by her side more often.
That was it. We decided we had to make a change.
Now we're in our 50s. The kids are grown. The jobs are more lucrative. The husbands (neither of them) pose any demands. So Debbi and I made a promise to spend more time together. We made a commitment to get together at least twice a year and do something special. Just us. Girl's weekend. Sometimes she rides the train the 100 miles to my house and sometimes I make the drive to her place.
In April we took a trip. A very special trip. It was an online deal I just couldn't pass up! A girlfriend's weekend in Calistoga. Wine tasting, facials, massages and MUD BATHS!
Now, it's no secret that Debbi inherited a major dose of germ-a-phobia from her mother. When I told her we were getting into vats of mud, she turned pale, gasped and hollered, "The same mud that other people get into?!" I promised her this was going to be an adventure! Everything is clean and safe! And besides, next time you can choose the trip and try to make me do something disgusting!
In the end, I know the whole mud bath thing was a trial for her, but she did it. We stripped down, naked as jaybirds, and wriggled down into that brown goo. I loved it; she plotted ways to have me murdered.
Because I spent the weekend with my most enduring friend, because we tasted delicious wine and drank in the beauty of the Napa Valley, because she knew I'd love pate on the patio, because she got in the mud for me, and because she's still in my universe, that was my best trip of 2009.
Pictures From Landon's Party
Pictures from the party for Landon, held at the clubhouse in Aunt Laura and Uncle Daniel's apartment complex in Sacramento.
Please keep in mind we were asked to come in a rocker costume...we don't normally wear crazy-lady red wigs!!
Please keep in mind we were asked to come in a rocker costume...we don't normally wear crazy-lady red wigs!!
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| Click here to view pictures from Landon's First Birthday Party |
And Now We Are One
Landon D. D. Musso turned one year old today. His parents are having a party for him at the apartment complex where his Aunt Laura lives. It's a costume party!
There is a book that has meant something to my little family for quite some time. It is called Love You Forever, and if you haven't heard of it, well...brace yourself. None of us in the family can read this through without crying; some of us can barely pass it on the shelf without getting choked up!
For Landon's gift I gave him a box, layered with the following:
A silly tee-shirt
A copy of Love You Forever
A poem I wrote for him in the style of Love You Forever
The coat Joel wore when he was Landon's age
Here is the poem I wrote for Landon:
mother wrapped her son in this coat.He wore it to fancy places and even to play in the snow.
When he came inside again, she would take him in her arms and rock him
Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth
And as her arms warmed him, she would sing,
I love you forever
I like you for always As long as I’m living
My baby you’ll be
Well, that boy grew.
He grew and he grew and he grew.
He grew so big that he outgrew this coat,
So his mother wrapped it carefully in tissue
And packed it away in a box.
As she put the box on the shelf, she quietly sang,
I love you forever
I like you for always
As long as I’m living
My baby you’ll be
Time passed and the boy became a man.
He and his wife had a son of their own and they named him Landon.
Landon’s birth meant the boy’s mother had become a grandma.
Well, Landon grew.
He grew and he grew and he grew.
Before anyone knew it, he was ONE YEAR OLD!
Grandma decided it was time to take the box off the shelf.
As she wrapped this gift, she sang to her grandson,
I love you forever
I like you for always
As long as I’m living
My grandson you’ll be
Vacation #2 - Birthday and Recovery
Steve and I headed south after work Thursday. After stopping part way for dinner, we made it to Bakersfield by about 11:00 and checked into The Red Lion. I figured this would be a great way to break up the trip and it worked well. We got to Spike's in the early afternoon Friday, in time to help with party preparations.
Trevor is an amazing cook. I only rarely get to taste his masterpieces, but every time has been a treat. He stuffed huge slabs of pork roast with yumminess and grilled them. Yum! Here's Trev showing off his major food groups.
Bettie rounded out the buffet-style dinner with baked beans, potato salad, corn pudding, apples stewed with onions, and a caprese salad.
Steve was amazing. How many guys say, "You want to go visit your ex-husband's family? Heck yeah, I'm in!" But that's not all. He washed dishes almost the entire evening! One of the cousins jokingly dubbed him The Queen of Dishwashing. (Sorry, Steve.)
It was so great to be together with all the Mussos again. Friends, family and neighbors came out to wish Spike a happy birthday. Several of us took thousands upon thousands of pictures, but I won't post them all here. A link may be forthcoming if we can compile them all. Anyway, after a song and cheers of encouragement, Spike managed to blow out all his candles. (We didn't torture him with 95 of them.)
Steve and I spent that night at the Anaheim Plaza Hotel, only to discover the next morning that they did not have any hot water! Back to Spike's house for showers and breakfast. We hung around until Uncle Al was picked up for his ride back to Morro Bay, then it was time for us to head out.
Saturday afternoon we headed up to Van Nuys to visit George and Carlene. Although their world was recently unbearably shaken, they welcomed us warmly and we had a very nice visit with them. I worked on Carlene's computer a bit, they took us to dinner, we spent the night there and had breakfast with them Sunday morning. All in all, I think we accomplished what I had hoped, which was to give them a bit of a diversion.
We learned a few more things about the accident. The Viper was not Doug's. It belonged to the owner of the company he worked for, a man who has been Doug's friend since they were in grade school together. Doug was out making sales calls and picked Jessica up to tag along. About 10 minutes from home he lost control and the car spun around into the oncoming lane. Although no one knows completely for sure at this point, they believe it may have come to a complete stop before the SUV came around the corner - speeding - and plowed head first into them.
Jodi, at the time, was at home. A little after 4:0o she called her parents, concerned that Doug and Jessica weren't home when they said they would be, and telling them she wasn't able to reach Doug on his cell phone. Since they were normally very punctual, and since Doug basically lived out of his cell phone, she was extremely concerned. George started calling the police and CHP. No accidents had been reported, however, because, as it turned out, the location of the accident fell within the jurisdiction of the County Sheriff's Department. While George was between calls, Jodi called back, hysterical, saying Jessica was dead and Doug was severely injured.
Most of what falls between then and now has already been reported, either in this blog or via email to family. Jessica was buried on a hill under a tree. The plots surrounding her have been reserved for the remainder of the family - Jodi, Doug, Michael, George and Carlene - when they go.
Jodi is pressing through this tragedy with amazing strength. While she has a very strong support system surrounding her, she stays by Doug's side nearly every day and goes home to an empty house at night to care for her dog and nurse her emotional wounds. She doesn't blame Doug for the accident. The consensus is that it is his employer's responsibility. He never should have let Doug take his car out without so much as a warning of its power, let alone demanding completion of a safety course - or, better yet, not letting him take it at all. As the bills for Doug's care have begun to be delivered to Jodi's house, she sends them to the employer and those bills are getting paid.
Doug is improving. On Friday evening, his family and Jodi reported that he had begun blinking in response to questions.
"Do you know who I am?"
Blink...blink.
Last week, surgery was done to repair his jaw. It had broken in four places. He was moved from UCLA to a small facility that specializes in traumatic head injuries. The scrapes on his face have healed and the staff has been able to shave him. His body is beginning to wake up and show some restlessness as his nervous system begins fully communicating with his brain again.
As of Sunday evening, Doug had not been told of Jessica's death.
After we left on Sunday, George and Carlene went to visit Doug. When we arrived home, we got the report that the visit went very, very well. Although Doug is not able to speak yet, he was able to communicate with both of them by blinking his eyes and squeezing George's hand. It was just the medicine they needed!
During our visit, George shared the following newspaper article with us:
Trevor is an amazing cook. I only rarely get to taste his masterpieces, but every time has been a treat. He stuffed huge slabs of pork roast with yumminess and grilled them. Yum! Here's Trev showing off his major food groups.
Bettie rounded out the buffet-style dinner with baked beans, potato salad, corn pudding, apples stewed with onions, and a caprese salad.
Steve was amazing. How many guys say, "You want to go visit your ex-husband's family? Heck yeah, I'm in!" But that's not all. He washed dishes almost the entire evening! One of the cousins jokingly dubbed him The Queen of Dishwashing. (Sorry, Steve.)
It was so great to be together with all the Mussos again. Friends, family and neighbors came out to wish Spike a happy birthday. Several of us took thousands upon thousands of pictures, but I won't post them all here. A link may be forthcoming if we can compile them all. Anyway, after a song and cheers of encouragement, Spike managed to blow out all his candles. (We didn't torture him with 95 of them.)
Steve and I spent that night at the Anaheim Plaza Hotel, only to discover the next morning that they did not have any hot water! Back to Spike's house for showers and breakfast. We hung around until Uncle Al was picked up for his ride back to Morro Bay, then it was time for us to head out.
Saturday afternoon we headed up to Van Nuys to visit George and Carlene. Although their world was recently unbearably shaken, they welcomed us warmly and we had a very nice visit with them. I worked on Carlene's computer a bit, they took us to dinner, we spent the night there and had breakfast with them Sunday morning. All in all, I think we accomplished what I had hoped, which was to give them a bit of a diversion.
We learned a few more things about the accident. The Viper was not Doug's. It belonged to the owner of the company he worked for, a man who has been Doug's friend since they were in grade school together. Doug was out making sales calls and picked Jessica up to tag along. About 10 minutes from home he lost control and the car spun around into the oncoming lane. Although no one knows completely for sure at this point, they believe it may have come to a complete stop before the SUV came around the corner - speeding - and plowed head first into them.
Jodi, at the time, was at home. A little after 4:0o she called her parents, concerned that Doug and Jessica weren't home when they said they would be, and telling them she wasn't able to reach Doug on his cell phone. Since they were normally very punctual, and since Doug basically lived out of his cell phone, she was extremely concerned. George started calling the police and CHP. No accidents had been reported, however, because, as it turned out, the location of the accident fell within the jurisdiction of the County Sheriff's Department. While George was between calls, Jodi called back, hysterical, saying Jessica was dead and Doug was severely injured.
Most of what falls between then and now has already been reported, either in this blog or via email to family. Jessica was buried on a hill under a tree. The plots surrounding her have been reserved for the remainder of the family - Jodi, Doug, Michael, George and Carlene - when they go.
Jodi is pressing through this tragedy with amazing strength. While she has a very strong support system surrounding her, she stays by Doug's side nearly every day and goes home to an empty house at night to care for her dog and nurse her emotional wounds. She doesn't blame Doug for the accident. The consensus is that it is his employer's responsibility. He never should have let Doug take his car out without so much as a warning of its power, let alone demanding completion of a safety course - or, better yet, not letting him take it at all. As the bills for Doug's care have begun to be delivered to Jodi's house, she sends them to the employer and those bills are getting paid.
Doug is improving. On Friday evening, his family and Jodi reported that he had begun blinking in response to questions.
"Do you know who I am?"
Blink...blink.
Last week, surgery was done to repair his jaw. It had broken in four places. He was moved from UCLA to a small facility that specializes in traumatic head injuries. The scrapes on his face have healed and the staff has been able to shave him. His body is beginning to wake up and show some restlessness as his nervous system begins fully communicating with his brain again.
As of Sunday evening, Doug had not been told of Jessica's death.
After we left on Sunday, George and Carlene went to visit Doug. When we arrived home, we got the report that the visit went very, very well. Although Doug is not able to speak yet, he was able to communicate with both of them by blinking his eyes and squeezing George's hand. It was just the medicine they needed!
During our visit, George shared the following newspaper article with us:Vacation Weekend #1
It's a crazy time, this. Spike (my ex-father-in-law, with whom I remain close) turned 95 on the 22nd. I had spent the better part of the summer trying to get the family down to Fullerton to visit him, to no avail. Either someone couldn't get the time off, or someone else couldn't afford it, or someone else had something else planned. It was ridiculous. So when Koby got Friday the 23rd off, I figured it was now or never.
After putting our plans in action, I found out that the extended family will be there on the 30th to celebrate his birthday with a big family BBQ get-together. Well...Koby couldn't change his days off so we kept our plan for Brooke, Koby and I to go down the weekend of Oct 24-25, and Steve and I will go down Oct 30-Nov 1.
Spike still lives alone, which is a testament to his ... tenacity? stubbornness? resiliency? For 95 years old, he is truly amazing, trimming trees, painting the kitchen, etc., etc. He's looking at surgery soon to get the battery in his pacemaker replaced. He's outlived four of them so far!
So, with no further ado, and too much tiredness to be any more creative, here are some visuals from our weekend with Spike and our stop in Visalia on the way home for a bite of Landon.
Come back next week for more photos from the Musso family's celebration-of-Spike's-95th-birthday-and-excuse-for-a-BBQ-and-get-together!
Please Slow Down
I have only one thing to say today.
A very sweet family that is dear to my heart is in some horrific pain. They've lost their only daughter, their only granddaughter. They may also have lost her father. The apparent cause of all this pain is some hot-dogging on the road.
Please slow down when you're out there. Our roads should not be a war zone. What's the big rush?! Slow down.
Take care of the people who bob in and out of your sphere as you move through this life. Everyone has a family, friends, people who love them, a mother who once held them close to her breast. Devastating loss occurs when you're not paying attention. All it takes is a moment. Slow down.
Please just slow down.
RELATED LINKS:
In Memory of Jessica Roberts
Jessica's Memory Slideshow
A memorial held by Jessica's softball team
ViperClub Discussion Board
Memorial in the West Valley Girls Softball Newspaper
Response to story in The Acorn
Calabasas 365.com
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