Seriously.

Queen's Decree, Addendum #1

It is rude and unacceptable to listen to your MP3 player through your ear buds or to have a non-emergency or non-work-related conversation on your cell phone while spending time with The Queen. If you do so, your actions say nothing less than, "You are not important to me and I wish to exclude you from my consciousness."

Back to Work...and other inane comments

Yesterday was my first day back to work. I'm so grateful they held my job for me and so happy to have an opportunity to be useful again. It's uplifting to discontinue my boneless lump impression. I must say I do look forward to retirement, though. Boneless lumps notwithstanding, I never did run out of projects around the house.

Day-before-yesterday was Independence Day and it was a lovely one for us. We sat out front and watched our neighbors light their fountains and sparklers, then retired to the back yard and sat in the dark enjoying the balmy evening, watching as other, unknown neighbors set off their unsafe and insane fireworks. In other words, the good kind.

And now, for no particular reason, for he needs no reason other than because he's just so stinkin' cute...

When I Am Queen

When I am queen, I shall outlaw the use of "no problem" as a response to "thank you." Likewise "no worries" or anything other than "you're welcome" or "my pleasure." Violators will experience how a problem actually feels.

Service providers who address any group that includes a female as "you guys" shall be drawn and quartered.

People who wear hats indoors and/or sit sideways in a restaurant booth and people who fondle their electronic devices while dining or otherwise engaging in any encounter with humans will have their hat/legs/devices removed with a swift round-kick.

Anyone caught expectorating in public will get the hose.

Social etiquette will be a required course throughout a child's 12-year school career. Refresher courses required annually for adults.

Parents who speak rudely to their children and those who walk ahead of their child appearing to not give a rat's ass whether the child is still there, somewhere, behind them, will find the child gone. Gone. To Narnia.

People will be encouraged, not scolded, for addressing a woman as "ma'am." This is NOT an insulting term used to point out advanced age but rather a sign of respect, just as men may be addressed as "sir." Whoever decided otherwise is a buffoon.

Clothing companies will be required to adhere to strict sizing specifications for both men and women. No ambiguous "small-medium-large" sizing, and no vanity sizing. Simply state the length, width, and girth at the important points on a garment and let us not have to spend hours in a fitting room trying on more guilt and shame.

Got any peeves you'd like me to consider once I'm queen? Feel free to leave them in the comments and I will take them under consideration.

Now off with you.

Treading Results

A huge THANK YOU to each and every one of you who chose to cheer me on as I walked and exercised
my way through May and June. As a result of your support, not only was I able to spring back from my
treatments and regain my stamina, I was able to exceed my $500 goal and raise a total of

$578!

Treaders worldwide raised over $111,200 throughout May and June.

Those funds will be used by Love146 to continue their work in the abolition of child
sex trafficking by providing Prevention, Rescue, and Aftercare.

On behalf of all the kids yet to be rescued, and all those who are regaining their lives and souls

because of your contributions and the efforts of people who care,

THANK YOU!